So he/she had one last fling before they finally made the big leap to legally-on official documents-no longer just splitting the rent-till death do you part commitment huh? Well isn’t that just fabulous! Oh wait, it’s not!

People who are really ready to commit don’t have ‘one last fling’. They commit to that one person and have amazing relationships that hopefully last forever (a little fairy tale-ish I know, but hey I’m young and I’ve got big dreams!). People who are so far from ready to commit that they’re willing to change they’re identity and leave the country to get out of it have ‘one last fling’! And there is no rhyme or reason to why they don’t want to commit. Maybe they’re feeling pressure, ya know they feel like its the next logical step (something I’ve seen lately and heard a lot about – seriously though that’s such bull too). Maybe they’re not done sowing their wild oats yet. Maybe they just never want to get married but know that you really want to and want to make you happy. All these and more are possible. While it’s their job to come to you and talk to you about this before you spend thousands of dollars on a down payment of a church/venue, it’s your job to, once they’ve come to you, accept it. You can’t change their minds and you need to realize that. I don’t believe that there is only one right person in the world for a person so I don’t believe you should waste your time on someone who isn’t ready for what you are. Stop pressuring them and either wait until they are ready or move on. No one says you have to stay with them, especially if they don’t share your say relationship goals. Why put them and yourself through that? Why not spend that time you’re wasting on someone who is in love with you and you are in love and is ready to commit to marriage?

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