I may be young, but I’ve been searching for “the one”, my very own prince charming, since I was a little girl. I swear I was looking in the sandbox. And I’ve always known what I was looking for. I even made a list when I was 13. I wrote it on a piece of paper, sprayed it with my body spray and put it under my pillow every night (I know what you’re thinking, but I was only 13 and hey we all do ridiculous things when we’re young!).

Well guess what, he never came! I know, shocking! But why would he have? I mean A. I was only 13 and B. I was trying way too hard. And that’s the secret – stop trying so hard; in fact, stop trying at all! If you go around asking people how they met their mate you won’t hear too much of, “Well, I was looking for “the one”, and I found him/her.” Chances are they’ll tell you that they met him/her at the gym, at work or in the grocery store, and that “I didn’t expect to meet him/her” or “I wasn’t even looking to date at the time.” I mean, I met “the one” when I had pretty much decided I was going to stay single till at least mid-college. I had had a rough few months and, with going far from home for college, I wanted to experience it all. Then one day there he was. If I had been looking for someone I doubt I would’ve found him or he would’ve found me.

People put so much energy in to finding “the one”, but in my opinion it’s when you stop looking that mates just fall on your doorstep. Too much energy always seems to lead to a dead end. You have to relax and stop treating looking for “the one” like it’s your job. And I know that looking hard for “the one” is what it’s all about lately, especially with all those online dating sites, but posting yourself online and going out on some dates isn’t looking too hard – remember you do need to still do something and make some things happen for yourself. Just don’t spend every day on there acting like if you don’t find someone your life is over. I’m sure that as soon as you stop beating yourself up about finding someone, relax and step back to really look around things will all work out. Chances are there is someone around you right now that you’ve just overlooked because, well, you’re looking too hard!

Thanks for signing in, . Now you can comment. (sign out)